UPDATE: no oil pressure, oil pump, oil light
 

I'm stumped.

Oil pressure switch tested and working properly.

Ripped open the oil pan. Put in a new oil pump, primed it, made sure it connected into the Int Shaft notch and it turned fine. New O-rings on both ends of pipe, seals weren't 100% as I would like but better than before.

Oil light still on (I'm assuming it should still go off within a few seconds even with all the work done),

I have not done an actual oil pressure check, guessing that is next but not sure that is going to tell me anything I don't already know.

But still WTF. She hates me!!

Help?

Blocked oil gallery somehow? Or you've done something during the rebuild to create this problem. Did you forget to install any bearing shells? Which suggests something else. Maybe your new/used head is missing an oil gallery plug.

I wasn't around in 2011, but I gotta tell you, this sounds like complete nonsense to me. if you have an injector stuck open, you should have a dead miss on one cylinder, and even the most clueless person should recognize that easily. If you have an injector leaking pressure out of the system at shutdown, I would say that's not enough fuel to suggest the symptoms claimed here.

I would think the fuel pressure regulator was leaking.

But I could sure be wrong.