Cold in NE right now, had not started in 2 weeks. First it cranked slow like battery low, so then I turned on lights to get battery warmed - then it cranked fast and started. I put into drive and it stalled out, now a key turn equals no sound at all to starter and battery is fully charged at 13+ v. Is there a starter fuse - relay I can't locate?

 

No, there isn't.
"Turned lights on to get battery warmed..." Not sure what that means.
I'd say you have a weak battery.

 

There is no fuse/relay for the starter - there is a neutral starter switch - that bolts to the shifter - that only allows the starter to work in neutral or park - have you tried both? And do the reverse lights work? (controlled by the same switch)

Or just a bad connection at the battery terminals, or ground cables.

I've heard of the "turn lights on for a second to get battery warmed up" (in cold climates) Does that really work? (I live in the south)

 

Sounds like an old wives tale... and a sure way to drain the battery... but I've been wrong before...
and, good point except he doesn't say if he gets any dash lights on or nothing...

 

All lights are ok, even back-ups, thinking the easiest first... switching out the battery. Note: has original factory starter > 1988 / 385k

From the google overlords - so it must be true...:-)Q I have heard or read that turning on the ignition or lights for a short time before attempting to start a very cold car will make it easier to start. Is there any truth to this? If so, please explain why and say what procedure you recommend for starting.

A Fact or urban legend? In this case, it's fact. In extremely cold conditions, turning the headlights on for about 10 seconds before trying to start your vehicle can help the battery deliver a bit more cranking amperage, which in turn will increase the cranking speed of the engine, which improves the chances of the engine starting.

 

Turn the key on, high beams, heater fan running at full, and honk the horn - the horn takes the most current other than the starter - a weak battery will not sound the horn.

 

Turned out to be a bad starter solenoid, starter motor ok but replaced both as a new unit via ROCKAUTO.com...spins & cranks over faster than ever - so glad it wasn't ignition switch! [ Case Closed ]