Evening, all.
Brand new here and need a little help. Please see video outlining electrical trouble. She won't turn or even click.
Cheers.

 

Dead/bad battery. What makes you think the battery is good?

 

I figure it would have at least acted differently when hooked up to another car via cables if it were the battery.

 

First thing is to test that battery properly, either with a load tester or at least a voltmeter. Unhook the cables and go directly from the posts of the battery.

If that truly tests OK, now the search for a faulty connection is next. Check the post connectors, look for corrosion on the ground, look for starter wires being loose, corroded, or otherwise compromised.