So some background:

I took my mom's Volvo down to college because the Volvo is more suitable for driving in snowy/icy weather than our other vehicles.

It turns out I left the lights on overnight.

When I first started, the info said: Immobilizer - See manual

Here is my dilemma:
1. Battery is dead.
2. After trying to start the car, the key became stuck in the ignition. I have taken the detachable metal part out and locked my car, but the remote key stub is still in the ignition.
3. Steering is locked.
4. Cannot shift car to neutral, therefore I am stuck in a parking spot, and cannot move it to jumpstart it.

I've been told by friends, the options are 1) Changing the battery and 2) Towing it and having a mechanic look at it.

Thanks, for the help, y'all.

 

Replacing the battery will solve all if those issues.
To shift the car out of park the is a little spot on the lower left corner of the shifter panel. You will need to pry the top of the port open with a screwdriver. Once you have it open, stick the screwdriver (you can actually use the metal potion of the key for this if you don't have anything small enough) in the hole and gently pull the top of the screwdriver or key towards the back seats. Pull on the shifter at the same time and it should come out of park.

 

Thank you, good sir!

It was just a dead battery. I'm glad it was not an alternator problem!